more Origins, Singularity and dad
After an early lunch, I sit with my Dad as he falls asleep watching ESPN. My mind wanders again, and I return to geometry, singularities, and origins.
I don't really wonder about my origin, where I come from, because I know already. He's sitting there asleep, and the other half has gone down to Santa Ana/Westminster to shop and eat Vietnamese food with her sisters.
I mark dots on a white page and think about the Singularity and the Beginning of Time. I think about our origin. The thinking is not quite as sophisticated as Stephen Hawking's version. Still, I try to put myself into the Singularity's mind.
I'm a high-functioning socioempath, so I can do this. Lots of religious folks can accept the idea of a Singularity because the law's of Physics breakdown and anything is possible. It draws instant comparison to the Mind of God.
There is no beginning, no end, only the infinitely dense Mind of God. Everything is possible, and all colors interlaced. When I put myself there, I'm not a point or a dot but I'm all dots, all colors-- I'm Black!
I'm the Singularity; everthing and everything is me, full of me. And it is like this forever. After an infinite time thinking, my mind at last becomes empty, and a void forms at the beginning. Suddenly, I have a void, a null, a zero, a reference point, and an origin. I become a small s.elf from the big S.ingularity. This might be how I now see myself,
or I might feel this:
Either way, I'm still Black but I have a sense of origin. I still view myself as a Singularity, but now I sense the moment when my mind was completely empty, and therefore it's impossible for me to be a Singularity any more. I have become a first dimensional creature spawn forth from the empty mind of God.
It's really hard to experience-feel an empty mind, but here is the kanji for it, drawn by the spirit of Aikido sensei Hiroshi Ikeda.